Monthly Archives: May 2011

Potty Training Revisited

Yesterday, I decided it was time to attempt potty training again. Compared to Samara, who is only three months old, Ari is like an old man.

He’s going to be three-years-old tomorrow and that means it’s high time he spent some quality time on the toilet.
Yesterday, I put him in underwear all day long. He peed all over the floor, and (eventually) in the toilet multiple times. I was so focused on the task at hand, that I canceled a playdate I had previously scheduled. I told my friend, Liz, that there was pee all over my house and that we’d better hang out another day.
Each time he peed in the toilet, he got a cat cookie.
Despite all the peeing on the floor and the soaked underwear, my crowning achievement as a mother occurred when I woke up this morning to find that Ari had slept in underwear in a dry bed!
Today, he has peed on the toilet numerous times, and pooped on the bathroom floor once. Progress!
Hopefully he will be wearing underwear when he enters college.

The Day Two Cats Escaped

Yesterday morning, I was in a sleepy haze, when I heard Wil come in the door from work around 5:00am.

“Babe,” He said “Uh…there’s a cat outside our door. He’s really cute.”
“No…” I grumbled “We can’t keep him.”
“But, I don’t know what to do with him…I’m gonna feed him. I think he’s hungry.”
“Okay…but don’t bring him in here…” I said drifting back off to sleep.
A few hours later, there was a knock at my door, it woke me up. It was our neighbor from downstairs.
“Hi!” She said cheerily “Is this your cat?” Before I even looked down to see what cat she was talking about, I said:
“No, no, no…he’s a stray…” then I glanced down and saw him.


“Oh! He’s not our cat, he’s my parent’s cat…uh…Dusty.” I was clearly not awake, my hair was sticking up, and I was wearing a gross tee-shirt and pajama pants.

“Thanks-thanks so much. I’ll bring him back…have a great day.” She smiled politely, went on her way out the door, most likely thinking that I was a giant slob.
I walked the formerly homeless cat known as Dusty back downstairs to his rightful owners.
**Later that day**
We were downstairs at my parent’s place playing in the backyard. I was also attempting to multi-task by doing laundry. When Ari came back inside the house, he left the garden door open and Faryl the cat escaped!

Try as I might, I could not lure Faryl the cat back in the house. I called to him, I opened a can of tuna, but he was not having it. Ari even tried to help me to get Faryl back in the house. But he ended up scaring him away. At the sound of Ari’s voice, Faryl ran under the deck in my parent’s garden.

I called my mom and told her what was going on. She said not to worry and that she would rescue Faryl from the depths of the Fader Garden when she returned home.
I received a voicemail in the wee hours of the evening, yesterday, from Liz Fader informing me that she had captured Faryl and returned him home.
May 3, 2011 will go down in infamy as the day two cats escaped! Also, it was my friend Xylia’s birthday.

Bottle it Up or Let it Out

I consider myself a sensitive person. Although, I keep a lot of my sensitivity on the inside. Something someone says will offend me and often, I don’t say anything. After years of therapy, I’ve learned to express my emotions better. The trouble is, it takes me an extremely long time to get the chutzpah to say what’s on my mind.

I suppose the reason that I’m afraid to say how I feel, is because I’ve been burned in the past. I’ve told people how I felt, and they haven’t been receptive to it. I guess the trick is to have conviction in myself. Regardless of how the other person reacts, I know what I feel, and what I think, and that’s what matters. Easier said than done. I think I might need to get back in therapy to work on that one.
I’ve been thinking a lot about my sensitivity when it comes to my kids. I want them to be able to express themselves without fear. I want them to have confidence in their beliefs, in their feelings so that they aren’t plagued by displaced emotions.
But if they see their mother bottling her feelings up, will they model after her? It’s not that I want to conceal my emotions, it’s just that I’m so used to doing so. Think about biting your nails, it’s a bad habit that’s hard to break.
Then again, kids sometimes rebel against their parents. Maybe my repressed emotions will inspire them to be blunt. That would be hilarious. I can see it now. I’m running into the bathroom to cry, and they’re spouting truths to each other.
I’ve resolved to try to say how I feel more often, regardless of the consequences. It’s a very scary concept to me, but I feel it’s important for my children to see me express myself.
How about you? Do you bottle it up, or let it rip? What say you?

This Won’t Hurt a Bit (And Other White Lies), Michelle Au Cracks Me Up

Recently, Ari was in the hospital for nearly a week. During the course of our stay, we met numerous doctors and nurses, and I can only remember one of them who had a decent sense of humor. Her name was Shantel, and she was a Libra nurse. None of actual MDs ever cracked a smile.

Ironically, as we were walking into the hospital (to get admitted) , my great friend Leah sent me an email recommending I take a look at a blog called The Underwear Drawer. She said:
“Do you want to review a book? There’s a really funny blog I read by a mom/doctor. She is so funny! You will love it. I feel like you guys should be BFFs via the Internet.”
Well, she didn’t need to convince me any further. The book was called This Won’t Hurt a Bit (and other white lies), and the blog in question belonged to Michelle Au.
I clicked on over to The Underwear Drawer, and I immediately fell in love with it. Michelle is an anesthesiologist and lives in Atlanta with her husband, Joe (also a doctor), two boys Cal, 5, and Mack, 2, and their dog Cooper.
She, unlike the stone-faced doctors I’d become accustomed to, is downright hilarious. Take, for example, the first sentence of her book This Won’t Hurt a Bit (and other white lies):
“WHAT IS HAPPENING NOW IS THIS: I am wearing a pair of too-large latex gloves, with my right hand reaching up between an eighty-five-year-old man’s legs, searching for his anus.”
Need I say more?
I contacted Michelle Au, and asked if I might be able to review her book, and if she’d mind answering some questions about it. She graciously agreed. Without further ado, here is what Michelle had to say:

1. Tell us about your book “This Won’t Hurt a Bit and Other White Lies.” What was the inspiration for it?

The genesis for the book came from writing my blog “The Underwear Drawer,” which I’ve been keeping for the past ten years, since the beginning of my second year of medical school. Someone once told me to keep a journal from medical school, because the experiences I would go through would be so unbelievable—the blog was really nothing more than an online journal that everyone could read. A lot happens in ten years, and I’m so grateful to have a record of my development from a junior medical student to an attending physician—both on my blog and in the book.

2. What is the origin behind your blog title, “The Underwear Drawer?”

The underwear drawer is where I used to keep my private journal when I was a teenager. It seemed like a clever title when I started the blog, but I do regret not picking a name that sounds quite so much like a porno site.

3. What do you like the most about being a doctor?

Being a doctor is very much like being a parent, in that in the end, the focus should never be on you. It’s about your child; it’s about your patient. The rewards of both roles are similar as well; the trust you are bestowed and the responsibility that you shoulder go hand-in-hand. It’s tremendously rewarding to interact with patients who literally trust me with their lives within minutes of meeting me. Rewarding, and a little scary.

4. Describe each of your sons in three words.

Cal, my five-and-a-half year-old son, is deliberate, sensitive, and precocious. I often call him a little old man, and he is, but in the sweetest possible way. Mack, my two year-old, is in many ways the exact opposite: sunny, exuberant, and fearless. The amazing thing really is how well they get along, and how much fun I have watching them together.

5. What does your husband, Joe, think of the blog and the book?

He’s tremendously excited! I think he had some apprehension in the beginning about privacy and having our lives put on display, particularly with respect to our kids. In medicine in particular, it’s a fine line to tread between sharing stories and exploiting them. But I think I’ve managed to put limits on what I share and ultimately, he trusts me with the curation of the blog and the book, so he’s nothing but thrilled about the book coming out. That’s the value of a good life partner, the trust, and sharing the fun times along with the hard ones-there’s no way I could have written this book, or do anything that I do, without him.

6. What are three must-have items for new moms? Besides sanity, sleep, and chocolate.

There is only one must-have item, and that is a good partner to share the experience with, be it a spouse, family member, or friend. As getting through a medical residency proves, sleep and sanity are not strictly necessary, though, like the chocolate, it helps.

7. You have a dog right? Who walks him?

Yes, we have a dog, her name is Cooper, and we got her during our last year of medical school. She was named, just so you know, for a Dr. Cooper who precepted us during a rotation in family medicine (and whom we often referred to privately as “Coop Doggy Dog”)—we chose the name before we actually adopted the dog, so the fact that Cooper actually turned out to be female was only a secondary consideration. Nowadays we live in Atlanta and have a yard, so we don’t need an actual “walker” quite like we did when we lived in Manhattan. Manhattan is the land of the professional dog walker.

8. What do you miss the most about NYC?

The food. The food culture in New York is incredible, and I miss being post-call and just being able to head out for lunch or at 3:00am and basically be able to sample from any kind of world cuisine I could think of. I miss my family too, and I wish for the kids’ sake that we were closer to at least one set of grandparents. (Joe’s parents live in Ohio.)

9. When is your book coming out? I want to read it!

The book is actually available right now! Online, in bookstores, wherever. I can’t wait for you to read it either!

10. Do you like ice cream? I like ice cream. What’s your favorite flavor?

My favorite flavor of ice cream is whichever one is in the freezer right now.

***

I’m in the midst of reading Michelle’s book right now. Stay tuned for a review!

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But wait! There’s more! If you’re interested in meeting Michelle, she’s having a book signing event at Columbia Univeristy Book Store on May 11. Click here for for info.

Random Life Observations

I don’t want to alarm anyone, but I think something might be wrong with me. I can’t think of anything to write. Well, that’s not entirely true. I have some ideas, but many of them are “too personal” or “too provocative” and I’m not sure I can deal with the fall out after posting them. Instead, I’m going to share some things I’ve noticed lately, using photographs to illustrate them.

I enjoy driving.

Ari enjoys throwing sand…
And stealing other people’s tricycles.

Even in New York City, you can still find a bird’s nest.

Samara is getting bigger by the day.

Ari is going to be three years old. I can’t believe it.

Finally, I have two kids. No really…two of them. Wil looks mad in this picture, but insists that “the sun was in his eyes.”
What have you noticed lately?

Recess Monkey LIVE at The 92Y Tribeca

Today Ari, Samara and I had the awesome opportunity to see Recess Monkey live at 92Y Tribeca! As usual, they rocked the house, and had whole crowd, kids and adults, dancing up a storm.

It was our first time at The 92Y Tribeca, and it was a really nice space. I’m looking forward to checking out future events there for kids.
Thank you, Recess Monkey, for an amazing show!

Flying High With Recess Monkey

It’s a constant challenge trying to find children’s music that both Ari and I like. One fateful day in 2009, Ari and I found our favorite band, Recess Monkey! We’ve been in love ever since. Recess Monkey consists of three teachers, who also happen to be amazing musicians, from Seattle.


Jack Forman (who plays Bass and does vocals) and I kept in touch over time. I even made some silly videos of Ari with Recess Monkey playing in the background.

Mr. Forman even let me interview him for OS/NS Mom.
Here’s Ari dancing to “My Favorite Book” one of the new tracks on their new album “Flying.”
I was psyched when I got an email from Elizabeth, Recess Monkey’s PR manager, with the news that “Flying” was available for review. I knew Ari would be pleased too.
Recess Monkey’s “Flying” is a lot of fun, just like the rest of their albums. One of my favorite tracks from “Flying” is called “Invisible Friend.” The song is a dialogue between a child and his imaginary friend. It’s such a common childhood theme, and is so well illustrated in this track.
One of the best things about Recess Monkey’s music is how danceable it is. You put their music on and you (and your kids for that matter) want to bust a move. Check out Ari (when he was 18 months old) dancing to their song “Fort.”
The tracks on “Flying” are so much fun! They make you want to move your body. Another one of my favorites is “Bunk Bed.” It’s a doo-wop 50′s-esque tune about sharing a bunk bed with a sibling; another common childhood theme, and brilliantly done musically.
Today is a particularly exciting day, because we are off to see Recess Monkey live! Stay tuned for pictures of the event.
“Flying” will be released on June 21, 2011. Buy it here on CD Baby!