Monthly Archives: May 2009

“That’s Cause You Don’t Got Kids!”

Posted on May 21, 2009 | Leave a comment

It was a Wednesday afternoon and I was perusing the aisles at Duane Reade. I had one purchase in mind, a pregnancy test. I brought my item to the cashier to purchase. She noticed what I was holding in my right hand and said

“Oh! Are you excited?”

I clutched the E.P.T test

“Yes,” I replied

“You got kids?” She asked with a smile

“No.” I replied.

“That’s ‘cause you don’t got kids.” she said and began laughing uproariously. It turned out I was, in fact, pregnant. Nine months later I delivered my son.

Adjusting to motherhood has been tough. But tougher still was finding out that the other people in my life could not understand that I was now a mom. I have compiled a short list of unhelpful questions and comments that people have offered me, post child.

1.“Why is your house so dirty? Can’t you clean when the baby is napping?”

My house does not look like “Martha Stewart’s Living” because I am busy caring for a child 24 hours a day. As far as cleaning when the baby is napping the first issue there is that the baby refuses to nap. Perhaps you could come to my house and force my child to sleep? And then I could clean so that my house would be more aesthetically pleasing to you.

2. “Why don’t you come out with us?”

When you have a baby you relish any free time you can get. Now, the use of the word “free” here is relative. When my son goes to sleep at 7:00pm I can’t go have a night on the town, go to the movies, even go out for coffee. I have to sit in my apartment and wait just in case he decides to wake up spontaneously and needs something. So my “free” time is watching TV or looking on the internet for celebrity gossip by myself in my pajamas. Somehow this has escaped my friends and family and they continue to invite me out to dinner, the movies and various events that fall after dark that I obviously cannot attend.

3. “How can you let him cry when he goes to sleep? Why are you still breastfeeding? Can’t you give him formula? He’s really fat.”

News flash everyone: babies cry. Or didn’t you get the memo? Sometimes they cry when they are trying to get to sleep too. I am still breastfeeding because women have been doing it for centuries and my son still accepts the milk that my body is making especially for him. I could give him formula ignoring all the wonderful immune system benefits that breastfeeding offers, but what good would that do? As far as his “obesity” is concerned, that baby fat will come right off once he starts walking. And if you think he is packing on the pounds perhaps you should look in the mirror and recall the last Weight Watchers meeting you attended. When it comes to raising my child, please keep your opinions to yourself. He has survived this long without your pearls of wisdom; I think I am doing wonderfully without you.

4. “I, your friend, would like to recommend an impossible alternative.”

Maybe you need a day to yourself without the baby? Why don’t you ask your husband to take the day off so you can go on a yoga retreat? Why don’t you take a nice warm bath or a nap? These are just a few impossible solutions that your friends might earnestly offer to ease your pain as a new mom. They mean well, but they are ridiculous and unachievable because you have a child who is totally dependent on you.

I have learned a special kind of patience with these folk. If and when they do decide to have children, I will not be insensitive and offer them unattainable solutions to their problems. Nor will I instruct them on them how to raise their youth. But rather I will lend a sympathetic ear, having been there myself. I have realized one major thing when it comes to the childless people in my life. They cannot offer adequate advice and (in the words of the Duane Reade cashier) “That’s cause they don’t got kids.”

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Posted in Rants

Introducing Joe to Blue’s Clues!

Posted on May 19, 2009 | Leave a comment

My son and I are big fans of the TV show Blue’s Clues. The show first aired in 2001 with a host named Steve Burns. For those of you that have been following my blog, you know how much I love Steve.

Steve is a charismatic and highly engaging host. He calls the viewer a “friend” and makes one feel as if you are involved in his adventure. The adventure: solving a puzzle based on three distinct clues that his dog, Blue, has laid out for us; “Blue’s Clue’s”

I have been watching re-runs of the show (as it no longer airs new episodes) on Noggin. I noticed, somewhere along the line, that Steve is mysteriously no longer on the show. He is replaced by a fellow named “Joe.”

The Joe episodes of Blue’s Clues are okay at best. Let’s face it, he is no Steve. But the lingering question in my mind was: how did the show introduce Joe to the kids who were long time Blue’s Clue’s fans? They had known Steve for such a long time, it must have been tricky to do.

Well, I finally got my answer yesterday when I caught the episode: Meet Joe Scrapbook Adventure. The episode introduced Joe to the kids as Steve’s brother. The episode itself is an hour long, giving the viewers a chance to play with and get to know Joe. We even get to play a round of Blue’s Clue’s with both Steve and Joe together.

After playing a round of Blue’s Clue’s with both hosts, Steve announces that he has some exciting news; he is going to college! The viewer learns what college is, where he will be staying and that Steve will keep in touch via letters and the telephone. The whole episode was executed so well.

I was really impressed with how the producers of the show handled Joe’s introduction. It was done so gracefully and with such empathy on behalf of the children who had come to know and love Steve for years and years. There is even a special message to Steve in the credits of this episode thanking him for his work on the show. Joe’s introduction really furthered my love for Blue’s Clues.

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Posted in Blue's Clues

It’s All “Relative”

Posted on May 17, 2009 | Leave a comment

Ahhh yes the in-laws. If it isn’t hard enough to deal with your own family’s idiosyncrasies now you have to deal with your partner’s family’s quirks. They come to stay with you maybe when your baby is born or for special occasions like say a birthday or a major holiday.

For my part, I like my boyfriend’s family very much. However, the prospect of accommodating other people in my home is intimidating and causes me anxiety.

What if my house isn’t clean enough? What if they are not comfortable and they don’t tell me? I’m in a state of constant worry about…well, pretty much everything. The truth is I’m a control freak. And nobody knows my routine like well…me.

But, I must say, that the wonderful upside to having family stay with you is…the help!! They love their grandchild/niece/nephew/etc. as much if not more than you do! So they help you with pretty much everything.

My advice to you is, accept it! Even if you are a control freak like me. Because when they leave, you won’t have that help anymore. And you’ll notice the difference.

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Posted in Uncategorized

An Eventful Visit to CMOM (Children’s Museum of Manhattan)

Posted on May 14, 2009 | Leave a comment

I had the pleasure today of visiting CMOM (The Children’s Museum of Manhatan) with my son. As someone who grew up on the Upper West Side of Manhattan, I am familiar with the museum and have foggy recollections of visiting it during my childhood.

However, when I set foot into CMOM today, it was a totally new and exciting experience and entirely different from how I remembered it as a child.

As soon as I entered the museum I realized that I was going to have to do the dreaded task; check my stroller. I begrudgingly headed to the coat/stroller check line. As soon as I reached the front of the line I was reminded of how incredibly disorganized I am as a human being not to mention as a mom.

I stood there shifting items from the diaper bag to my purse not really knowing what I was doing. I finally got it together and set out with my son to explore the museum.

Note to parents visiting the museum: if you are going with an infant 25 lbs and under, since they require you to check your stroller, bring an infant carrier such as the Baby Bjorn or the Ergo Baby carrier. That way, if your baby has a meltdown and wants to be carried, you are prepared and your back won’t hurt when you arrive home.

Baby Bjorn Ergo Baby Carrier

I asked the woman at the information desk what I should start out with. She sent me to the 4th floor which was the baby and toddler-centric area.

When I arrived on the 4th floor, it was like baby utopia. The floors were carpeted and brightly colored. I didn’t know where to go first…but my son spotted some colored plastic balls, and fell instantly in love with them.

Then we noticed that there was a painting activity going on. A musuem employee had squirted different colored paints on a glass wall. The kids were supposed to smear the paint around and make designs with it.

“Do you think he’s too young for this?” I asked the musuem employee.
“No, he can do it!” She said confidently.

So I thought “what the heck!” I put a smock on him, rolled up his sleeves and off he went. And boy did he love finger painting!

Afterward, he freaked out when I had to wash the green paint off his hands but all in all he had a great time. And apparently they do this finger painting activity every weekday at 1:15pm. I have a feeling we’ll be back.

We spent the majority of the time on the 4th floor with the baby-centric activities; which, by the way, were great because I could just let my son roam around the floor and barely supervise him. He would find something he liked and explore it.

He also particularly enjoyed the Lower Level of the museum that housed the Kapla blocks. Similar to Lincoln Logs, Kapla blocks are simple wooden blocks that can built extraordinary structures.

All in all, my visit to CMOM was wonderful for me and my son. For more information on CMOM click here.

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Posted in Reviews

The Hardest Thing I’ve Ever Done to Date

Posted on May 14, 2009 | Leave a comment

I have stayed home with my son for exactly one year now. I just recently re-entered the work force as a substitute teacher for the New York City Department of Education. And let me tell you, after not working for one year, it is tough to go back to work.

Don’t get me wrong, having and caring for a child is a job unto itself; however, reporting to a place of work on a given day at a set time is work in an entirely different way from being a mom. Plus, when I return from said job to my home, I have to do my other job, mom. It’s really hard.

When I am working at my “real job” I can focus on what I am doing. I’m not thinking about my son, because I know either my parents or my boyfriend is taking care of him. But its when I get home and I haven’t seen my son all day, that I begin to feel sad and resentful of the “real job” from taking me away from my son.

Its a tough dilemna. I need to make money to pay rent and my bills, however, I don’t want to miss out on watching my son grow and change on a daily basis.

However, I do appreciate that my parents are the primary babysitters for my dear little boy. Though he is not with me when I am working, he gets to spend time with his grandparents.

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Posted in Deep Thoughts

In Response to Cat Antics

Posted on May 14, 2009 | Leave a comment

I’ve received a few responses to The Cat Antics blog. One was from Mint, stating that she was dissatisfied with the picture of Egreck because it didn’t accurately depict the image of baby and kitty sleeping together. I wholeheartedly agree with her on that one.

It’s too bad that I didn’t have a camera ready at 4am to catch those two in action. :p

However, I also received a response from Cordy saying that the same situation happened to her; she caught her cat, Piotr Lev, and her baby in the crib together. So I asked her to send me a picture of this event to post on my blog. That way the readers will know that I am not alone.

Also, it will satisfy Mint’s craving for a baby/kitty crib picture. Although, Pitor Lev, is clearly awake in this photo. Sorry Minty.

So here it is:

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Posted in Uncategorized

Cat Crib Antics

Posted on May 13, 2009 | Leave a comment

I went to sleep late last night. I’m talking late, like midnight late. My son had been asleep since 7pm and for some reason I could not get myself to wind down.

Finally, after watching massive amounts of television, I knocked out. My boyfriend stumbled home from his overnight shift at the airport at 5am. I woke up abruptly to him standing in the bedroom doorway:

“Babe! You know the door is wide open?!” He said pointing to the doorway of the bedroom.

He was right.

I sat up immediately.

“Oh my G-d!” I shouted. My first thought was: the cats! Generally, we keep the bedroom doors closed so the cats can’t come into the room at night.

“Go check on the baby!” I exclaimed.

My boyfriend rushed over to my son’s crib to find a sleeping baby next to…a sleeping cat. They were curled up next to one another comfortably. I didn’t know whether to laugh, cry or scream at that point; so I let my boyfriend deal with the situation. He promptly removed Egreck, my cat, from the crib, and we all went back to sleep.

Pictured above is the illustrious crib hopper.

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Posted in Anecdotes, Cats

Dr. Michael Thompson Rocks!

Posted on May 12, 2009 | Leave a comment

I recently wrote an email to Dr. Michael Thompson praising him on his book, It’s a Boy.
The book talks about child development with regard to boys specifically.

I really enjoyed his book and admire Dr. Thompson as writer and clinician. So I decided to tell him all of this in an email. I sent him a short note stating how much I liked his book (It’s a Boy) and how it inspired me to write a blog about developmental milestones.

To my surprise and delight he wrote back:

Dear Sarah,

Thanks for sending me the link to your blog. I very much enjoyed your piece on developmental milestones and competitiveness.

Warmly,

Michael

I wrote back to him asking if I might include his response in my blog. He responded almost immediately back stating:

Dear Sarah,

Yes, you may post my comments on your blog, but let me add a couple of sentences:

“Thanks for sending me the link to your blog. I very much enjoyed your piece on developmental milestones and competitiveness. What you say about moms and dads subtly competing about their children’s milestones is so true…and more than a bit sad. It suggests that the children of “good parents” reach their developmental milestones faster and the less rapid developers are slow because their parents aren’t doing something right. These assumptions are almost always wrong, but the real problem is that this kind of competition is demoralizing and alienating. It leaves parents lonely at a time when they need friends the most, i.e. when they have needy, tiring young children. The hard thing for parents to accept is that DEVELOPMENT is in charge of development, not parents.

May I just say that any admiration that I had for Dr. Thompson has now been exponentially multiplied.

So please check out Dr. Thompson’s book if you have a son. It will shed some light on key developmental issues and help you to become a better more understanding parent.

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Posted in Contacting People, Psychology

The Transition to Solid Foods

Posted on May 9, 2009 | Leave a comment

My son has been eating baby food jars since he was six months old. I only feed him organic baby food because I feel that it has the purest ingredients for his little body. His favorite brand is Earth’s Best Organic Baby Food

However, he is having a really hard time transitioning from pureed baby foods to solid foods at a year of age.

He likes certain solid foods a lot. But his issue with solid food is mainly the texture. He finds the texture of many solid foods unpleasant. I offer them to him and he spits them out instantly.

So far he has rejected:

-avocado - which everyone insists is a winner. He says - not so much.
-peas - I put a pea in his mouth, he sticks his tongue out and the pea shoots back out onto the high chair tray.
-salad - He doesn’t know what to make of it, so he throws it on the floor.
-boiled carrots - same tongue action as the peas
-broccoli- It’s so weird looking, it must be a toy
-black beans - he makes a strange face, sticks his tongue out and the beans fall to the floor
-most vegetables in general - he hates the texture and the taste

So far he likes:
-breaded baked chicken breast - I cut it into little pieces and he eats it all up. Loves it!
-steak- I marinate it it olive oil and soy sauce and also cut it into tiny pieces. Loves it
-bananas- Who doesn’t love bananas?
-spinach - but only if it is sauteed in garlic and olive oil and hidden in a piece of steak
-oatmeal - I wish I could explain this one. It’s so bland. But he loves it.
-yogurt- creamy delicious yogurt. He loves it.
-scrambled eggs- soft and easy to eat. But only eats them if there is salt and pepper on them and if they are made with olive oil
-bread- soft and chewy, it is his new pacifier when I am out at a restaurant
-Cherrios - bite sized, he can feed himself ten at a time now. He is totally addicted

He is quite a fussy eater. I’ve asked his pediatrician about the transition from baby food purees to solid foods. She says that it takes time, and that I shouldn’t give up. Just keep offering him different choices of foods. She also says that kid’s tastes change. He may not like avocado now, but I should try it again at some point.

I don’t know…so far he’s rejected avocado on three distinct occasions.

I wrote to Earth’s Best to see if they had any suggestions with regard to the solid food transition. Hopefully they will have some advice to offer.

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Posted in Child Development, Food

Adiri Bottle Review

Posted on May 6, 2009 | Leave a comment

Adiri was kind enough to send me a sample of one of their Natural Nurser bottles to sample. I was able to try the bottle out on my son. The following is my review of the Adiri Natural Nurser Ultimate Baby Bottle - Stage 1.

The Adiri bottle is designed to simulate breast. On the box it states “Introducing the ultimate baby bottle: the world’s most breast-like bottle experience.”

Pictured above is the Adiri Natural Nurser. On the left is the bottle and on the right is the cap.
After receiving the bottle I read the product instructions, which prompted me to boil all bottle parts in hot water for five minutes before use.
Well, unfortunately in my haste to try the bottle out, I didn’t read the directions well enough. I put the pumped breast milk directly into the upside down bottle and the milk spilled everywhere. So I had to start over again.

Note to Adiri users, read instructions thoroughly; even if you are one of those people who ‘hates instruction manuals’ and can ‘figure it out on your own by trial and error.’

So, I washed the bottle and parts out with hot soapy water as instructed by Adiri. I waited a few hours and pumped again.

This time I read the manual. It told me to:

-put the cap on the bottle

-turn bottle and cap upside down so that nipple is facing downward

-make sure the nipple is securely in the cap

-screw open the bottom of the bottle

-pour breast milk into the bottle

-screw cap back on

-finally turn bottle right side up.

At last, I was ready to try out the bottle on my one year old son who has not taken a bottle since he was five months old.

I put the Adiri Natural Nurser on his high chair tray in front of him. I kid you not, he immediately grabbed it, placed it in his mouth, drank from it, and smiled.

He was in love.

The only issue that he had was the flow seemed to be a bit too slow for him. He didn’t get frustrated, he just seemed like he wanted more milk then he was getting at one given time. I may have to purchase a faster flow version of the Natural Nurser from Adiri.

The Natural Nurser comes in three flow rates. 0-3 months, 3-6 months and 6 months to one year. Perhaps he will like the fastest flow the best.

All in all, my son really liked the Adiri Natural Nurser. As a breastfeeding mom, I wholeheartedly recommend this bottle to babies who are nursing and do not take a traditional bottle.

For more information on the Adiri Natural Nurser, visit their website