Yesterday we went to a wedding where we did not know the bride and groom. The wedding was more like a 25th anniversary, actually, a renewal of vows. We got all gussied up:

And off we went. As soon as we entered the church it was clear that my son was NOT going to sit through the ceremony. But the church happened to have this amazing playroom! First of all, it was pleasantly decorated and featured an elaborate mural with various forest animals and trees. There were a million toys, a crib, a changing table with diapers sizes ranging from New Born to 5, organic animal crackers for snacking, a TV/VCR/DVD combo with kids videos and DVDs just beside it. We were set. Boredom issue was solved, for now.

My nieces even joined us to help with the toddler entertainment process:

All was well, until we had to go to the wedding reception. We arrived at the Army Base where the reception was being thrown. My son could not sit still at the circular dining table. He was grabbing at forks, knives, spoons, asking for “wa wa” or water out of a glass every three seconds, throwing items from the table onto the floor at warp speed.

My only recourse was to remove him from the scenario and retreat into the hallway next to the dining room.

He zoomed up and down that hallway over and over again. He veered toward the “Gentleman’s Bathroom,” and almost entered it. But thankfully I grabbed him and redirected his 25 lb self before he got there.

During the course of his travels he managed to break a votive candle, shattering glass all over the Base hallway floor. At this point, my boyfriend and I decided, it was time to leave.

I honestly don’t know how people with toddlers attend to fancy events, aside from getting a babysitter. Please share your stories, suggestions and advice for these occasions. I need a game plan for next time!