Doyin Richards is my friend. He’s a cool dude who is raising two girls in southern California. In case you were wondering, his name is pronounced Do-ween. On the land known as the Internet, you may recognize him from his blog “Daddy Doin’ Work,” where I had the pleasure of guest posting. You also might remember the viral photo of him doing his daughter’s hair while holding his other baby girl in the Ergo carrier.
Doyin is a “Daddy Doin’ Work.” He believes in being an involved parent, an active role model in his girls’ lives and simply doing the work it takes to be a father.
He’s written a book by the same title: Daddy Doin’ Work, where his intention is to empower both mothers and fathers to be better parents. His concept has ruffled a few parental feathers, but I dig what he has to say.
According to Doyin, there are three types of dads:
1. Daddies Doin Nothing: These are men who literally do nothing in the way of parenting their kids. They are typically unemployed and sit at home all day while their partner is at a full time job busting their ass trying to pay the bills and pay for daycare. A Daddy Doin’ Nothing doesn’t play with his kids or interact with them. He is like a third child in the relationship.
2. Daddies Doin’ Something: These dads have full time jobs, and they believe that their role as a father is to work in order to provide financially for their children and wife. But as soon as they come home, they don’t want to do much parenting, they just want kick back and relax. Their wives/partners could be SAHMs, WAHMs or at full time jobs. Regardless, they don’t feel they need to parent when they get home from “real work.”
3. Daddies Doin Work: This is the category that dads should aspire to be. These dads pull their weight as parents. Whether they are CEOs at a large corporation or SAHDs they put in their work as a parent. They change diapers, take their children to the playground, and behave, you know, like a parent.
Doyin’s goal is to revolutionize the world of fatherhood and transform dads into Daddies Doin’ Work. But, on order to get dads to this category, Doyin asserts that we need to make sure moms are not enabling Daddies Doin’ Nothin’ and Daddies Doin’ Something.
I’ve read the book and I think he’s got some powerful words here. I would add (after reading Doyin’s book) that (in my opinion) there are moms who fit into these three categories as well. From a feminist perspective, the way I would look at it is that each parent should pull their own weight and help each other out equally.
Want to know more? Enter to win a copy of Doyin’s book below!