When someone asks me how I am, I usually give an honest answer. If I’m not okay, I say something like “having a hard day.” But typically I tend to overshare and say something that makes the person laugh, even if it’s surprising or seeming inappropriate. “How are you?” “Well, I just got my period, so I’m doing great!” Sarcasm goes a long way with folks. Life is hard sometimes and making people laugh is something I enjoy doing. So if you ask me how I’m doing, be prepared for an honest answer. I might not even know what’s going to come out of my mouth, but hey, that’s the fun of life. Keep the people guessing and use humor when possible. As a Jew, I tend to use a self-deprecating sense of humor. Making fun of myself somehow brings me joy. It’s good to have a sense of humor about one’s flaws, because if you can’t laugh at yourself then you might not know who you are well enough.
Then there are times when I don’t feel like oversharing. Maybe I’m going through a rough time and I want to forget about it for five minutes since I’ve been obsessing over what’s going on for days. That’s okay, I don’t need to tell everyone what’s going on with me. I’m not obligated to reveal the truth about every tiny struggle in my life. Why? I don’t know the dude in the elevator and he doesn’t need to be made aware that locked my keys in the car I’m getting a cyst on my back drained. If I feel like sharing about what’s happening with me that is my damn right and if I want to keep it to myself I don’t owe anyone an explanation. It depends on my mood as to how much I share or don’t share. I can’t predict how I’m going to feel on a given day. Maybe I’ll tell you what’s up or maybe I’ll give you an “I’m fine.” You might not hear about how I bumped into my neighbor while I was singing Britney Spears loudly walking in the courtyard. Oh wait, I just told you about that so that’s not a good example.
I’ve met people who are shocked at my outlandish sense of humor or the things that I overshare. Their surprise can be a positive thing or their reaction can be one of outward discomfort. Maybe they don’t know what to say, they’ve never encountered a person who blurts random things out what’s happening to them. That’s reasonable, but when they’re shocked at my weird overshare, I don’t know how to react to their reaction. I’m standing there looking at their confusion and I’m perplexed too. What do I do now? Do I run away? Do I apologize for being weird? I don’t want to because that’s me; I say things. But, now I have to make a choice: do I react to their reaction, or do I keep inside? Oy gavolt, I need to talk about this in therapy.