The Semicolon Project: Survivors of Depression and Self-Harm

//The Semicolon Project: Survivors of Depression and Self-Harm

The Semicolon Project: Survivors of Depression and Self-Harm

There was a time in my life when I didn’t want to live anymore. I was incredibly hopeless. I was afraid to wake up in the morning because when I opened my eyes I knew that I would have to face the day. If you haven’t struggled with depression, it’s hard to understand these feelings. But they are incredibly awful and real. They are debilitating.

In addition to having suicidal thoughts, I’ve also had (in the past) thoughts about cutting myself. I would have those thoughts when I felt hopeless and like my life was not going to get better. It was a manifestation of internalized pain. I would imagine cutting myself so that the pain would go away.

I never acted upon thoughts of self-harm. But I have friends who were self-mutilators. The thoughts alone were upsetting to me at the time. I can’t even imagine what it must feel like to harm oneself.

Today I found out about a brave movement called The Semicolon Project. Participants in this project are drawing tattoos of semicolons on their wrists to raise awareness about depression and self-harm.

I am here to tell you that I have lived with depression my entire life.

Photo on 4-16-14 at 9.43 AM

You are not alone. If you are scared to wake up in the morning, I have been there. If you’re afraid of the thoughts in your head, I was too once. You can make it through this. I did. I survived. You can too. You’re a good person, even if your brain tells you otherwise. Do not stop fighting. You are strong. I am with you. I am you.

So much love.

By | 2014-04-16T10:36:50+00:00 April 16th, 2014|Uncategorized|8 Comments

8 Comments

  1. jess.⚓ April 16, 2014 at 10:52 am

    I love this post. I too have been in that dark place. The thing with the dark place is, you are surrounded by lots of other people trapped in that dark place. You just can’t see them because it’s dark. So don’t stay quiet, speak up and let them know you are there too…because they feel just as alone. We may not be able to see each other in that dark place, but we can hear and feel each other.

    Together, we are strong and together we are not alone.

  2. Old School/New School Mom April 16, 2014 at 10:58 am

    That’s a beautiful way to look at it.

  3. Cristi Motto Comes April 16, 2014 at 4:05 pm

    Thank you for much for sharing your story Sarah and for linking up for the semicolon project. We really aren’t alone. I see that more and more each day and I come across people like yourself willing to share their stories and advocate for themselves and others. Thank you!

  4. Old School/New School Mom April 16, 2014 at 5:16 pm

    Thank you for creating this movement. You’re amazing.

  5. Kimberly M April 17, 2014 at 7:07 am

    You are beautiful. It doesn’t matter if you do or don’t. What matters is that you suffered, you fought and you survived…you wanted to keep your story going. Just talking about it helps more people than you know. You give them hope that, yes, one day you will find the peace that you’ve been starved of for far too long. Thank you so so much for taking part in this. It means a lot. And I’m so glad to have “met” you 🙂

  6. Old School/New School Mom April 17, 2014 at 4:28 pm

    Thank you so much for reading my story. You’re awesome. Great to meet you too!

  7. Tina April 18, 2014 at 9:38 am

    I suffered, no not suffered, lived and still live with mental illness. I have been diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder and PTSD. I have attempted suicide and still have suicidal thoughts at times. This really weighs on me because I am more than half way to becoming a LCPC. I am supposed to be helping people but sometimes I feel I can’t even help myself.

    I attempted to over dose once and for three days I teetered between life and death. I guess it was not my time to go because I made a full physical recovery. My mental state, on the other hand was not so great. I live with so much guilt about what I did to my family. I also worry about if my children will live with depression when they are older. That really scares me and is anxiety inducing.

    Although I live with mental illness, I will not allow it to control me! I get up every morning and I get dressed to face my day. I have to pick one positive thing to hold on to. Some days are definitely more difficult than others, but as long as I’m fighting I will survive.

    Thank you for having an open forum to speak out against mental illness. It is a fight within yourself that only others dealing with the same fight will understand.

  8. Old School/New School Mom April 20, 2014 at 12:54 am

    Thank you so much for sharing!

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