Dear United States Postal Service,
First I want to say thank you for delivering the mail. I am so grateful to you for being there to give me my important bills and sometimes even nice cards from my friends around the world. Sometimes you deliver checks with money for me to buy my family groceries. I am happy you exist.
That’s the good.
Now for the constructive criticism…
A couple of days ago, I placed an order on Amazon.com for my own book. Here it is:
It’s amazing that I got this book in the mail. I want to explain the story behind this book. I know you’re busy but just trust me on this. So my mother ordered it and had it delivered to my address. Okay? Now, the postal service managed to get it here in a timely fashion. Great, awesome, amazing. Thank you.
The next day, I ordered it and…I get a text from Amazon that says:
“I’m sorry, but your address is undeliverable.”
You just delivered the package here 24 hours ago. What in G-d’s name are you talking about?
This leads me to believe that you are lying about something.
Look, I’m not going to take up most more of your time…but I am upset that you claim to not be able to deliver my package to this address. It’s wrong. You need to take responsibility for your actions. I am so sad. I want my book and I want my other Amazon packages that you claim to deliver but are nowhere to be found. Yes, that happens too.
Let me explain-
I get a text notification saying my package has been delivered by USPS. I go to my lobby to look and it’s not there.
Please explain yourself.
I just want my mail.