I’m a Writer, But I Have Horrible Grammar

//I’m a Writer, But I Have Horrible Grammar

I’m a Writer, But I Have Horrible Grammar

I was cringing to myself just now as I wrote the title to this blog post. I have been a writer since I was six years old and I admit openly that my grammar is atrocious.  I am a 35 year old graduate of New York University. I have completed half of my masters degree in counseling and I still do not know the difference between “affect” and “effect.”

Some of this can be easily blamed on the New York City public school system circa 1987. I can remember having a handful of spelling tests, but grammar? What’s that? In junior high school I remember learning about declarative and interrogative sentences. Other than that, I never learned how to use a comma correctly.

I was 25 years old when I was properly introduced to the semicolon. I still have problems with it. We don’t get along that well and I pretend I know what I’m doing when I stick it in a sentence, but really I have no fucking idea.

I’m hoping, now that my son is in the NYC public school system, that things have changed for the better with regard to grammar instruction. I would like for him to be able to tell me how to use affect and effect properly. I still have to google that shit.

By | 2014-12-09T08:07:18+00:00 December 9th, 2014|Uncategorized|2 Comments


  1. jess.⚓ December 9, 2014 at 8:33 am

    Omg lol I google words too! And meanings. That’s how I use affect and effect properly. Plus…I had to google the difference between allowed and aloud lmao.

  2. Dara Finkel December 11, 2014 at 1:41 am

    I remember studying for a spelling test with you in 2nd, no wait, 3rd grade, no, wait, 4th? Whatever. Anyway, here’s my memory: I was all “Sarah, you spelled ‘answer’ wrong again.” And then you were all, “I know, shut up.”
    I have completely given into the fact that I will never be able to understand the difference between “affect” and “effect.” And I’m a smart person. English has set us up for failure.

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