I’ve been thinking a lot about this, and I’ve come to a conclusion; toddlers are terrorists.

Here’s how it breaks down:

Two year-olds are Kamikaze pilots. 
They’re on a mission to destroy themselves. They wish to explode in more ways than one.

Three year-olds are terrorists. 
They’ve moved past the stage of thoughtless self-destruction and attempts to murder themselves, and they’re on to plotting the destruction of your world. They will stop at nothing until they get their way.

Four year-olds politicians.
These small humans are an entirely different story. Four year-olds aren’t terrorists at all, they’re politicians. They’re tired of trying to sabotage themselves, and they’ve moved on to trying to prove you wrong through intense questioning sessions. Why? How? Who? Where? They’re relentless. A lot of the time, this group employs circular logic in order to achieve their goals, and their arguments often lack rationality.

The question on my mind is, what are five year-olds according to this model?