“Harry, I know something is going on! I have this sick feeling in my stomach, and I want you to tell me what it is!” Urie demanded sporting his radish face.
Harry sighed. I decided that I had better handle the situation.
“Urie, if I may address you so informally,” I began “I think it would be best if you went back inside your classroom and continued crying.” Urie cocked his head to the right and his mouth dropped open. He looked into the dishwater colored strands of my hair.
“What the…fuck?” he bent down to touch a strand of my hair.
“Mmm, that feels nice.” I said. “You can continue petting me if you wish.” Urie jumped back and shuddered as if a roach had just crawled onto his hand. He stood there for a moment and said nothing.
“No, no, this can’t be real. Harry, you’ve got some sort of tape recording device behind there or something. This is not real!” He stood very still shaking his head.
“Ironically, my friend, you are partially right about that. ‘This’ isn’t real.”
“Harry, what are you doing?! What is this?!” Urie exclaimed.
“Let me confirm your doubts, Urie.” I sighed “I know that every time Mz. Sweeny speaks a word, you hear a cacophonous sound that is unbearable. I know that you secretly hate her and all that she stands for. I know that your mother gives you the same thing for your birthday every year, a maroon sweater vest and a lemon meringue pie. And finally, I know that until today, Harry and your…”
“Stop!” Urie exclaimed “There’s no need to go on! I’ve never told anybody about my mother’s pies. They’re horribly disgusting.” I took that to mean that he no longer doubted my vocal capabilities.
“Very well then.” I responded.
“So what is it that you have to tell us, Mr. Mop?” Uried asked, and with that he began to laugh hysterically. Harry and Terrence joined in, and soon there was a festival of laughter.
I waited until the wave of laughter subsided and then I began to speak.
This is part 12 of my short story A Taste of Wool, a part of Wool Wednesdays. Each Wednesday I will be revealing a new portion of the story. To read part 11, click here.